![]() Dating means learning about yourself and what you want in a relationship. You may meet a lot of people before finding someone special, but it’s worth it in the end. As the relationship progresses, couples may start thinking about their future together and make plans. Sometimes people choose to date because they are interested in having sex, but other times they are looking for something more long-term. It’s important to feel comfortable and be yourself during the meeting. During a first date, people may choose to do something fun together and talk about their interests and hobbies. It’s an important part of life, but it can be hard at times. Engagements can be broken much more easily and can clearly be a better decision than getting married and divorced.ĭating is a way for two people to start getting to know each other and figure out if they want to have a relationship together. This fourth stage is also an important stage for couples to use to evaluate the relationship and their ability to be part of an emotionally intelligent relationship. Differences are normal and couples with open communication will learn about themselves and their relationship as they note how they handle these differences with each other. Questions about children, finances, careers, future goals and lifestyle should be discussed more fully. Open and honest conversations should be happening as couples plan their present and future together. There should be a relationship with each other’s family and friends, and this may be the start of a commitment phase. Stage 4: Commitment or EngagementĪt this stage in a relationship, couples should have a good understanding of their partner’s values, life style, and goals for the future. There is no need to rush through this important final stage, and every reason to go slowly. It is important to talk over their thoughts and feelings with their partner while finding ways to keep from “pushing” for commitment. Each person needs to listen to their own inner voice and wisdom. Pushing for an answer however, may cause real problems in the long term relationship itself. This is when the big question emerges even more strongly: “Where are we headed?“ Women have a tendency to ask this question before men, even though both may be wondering about the answer to this question. Some of those perpetual issues or differences such as free-spending or frugal, neat and orderly or sloppy and disorganized, interested in lots of time together or more involved in outside activities begin to emerge.Īt this stage of the relationship, couples will take note of the differences and may even begin to complain or attempt to problem-solve.Īs intimacy develops between the two people, more self-disclosure emerges, both verbally and nonverbally as couples act in ways that are more like how they are in their daily life. “Cute” habits might become irritating at this stage. Trust is stronger and more intimacies may be shared at this next stage as couples take away some of their “best face” and allow themselves to act more naturally and relaxed.īoth halves of a couple will notice weaknesses and differences or flaws. Couples often go “deeper” in their connection. Stage 3: “Enlightenment” and Becoming a Coupleĭuring this stage of a relationship, hormones are calming down and reality sets in. Going slowly in making any decisions about a romantic relationship is more likely to be better than moving quickly (unless it is clear that the relationship is not a good fit). For women especially there may also be a desire to figure out where the relationship is headed. Towards the end of this stage, and hopefully at other times throughout it, it is not unusual for questions of “is this the right person for me” to emerge. This stage may last for 3 or 4 months depending on the individuals and their maturity, experience and self-understanding. Often (not always) there is not enough “is this the right person for me” but rather more “what can I do to make this person like me?” Differences are not noticed or are dismissed with thoughts like “not a big deal” or “she will change”.Ĭouples generally do not have much conflict at this stage of the dating phase as each is really trying hard to impress the other person. At this stage, the attraction may not be too “deep” and each half of a couple is generally putting his or her best foot forward. It is also where physical intimacy may occur.Įarly attraction often involves the physical attributes of the potential partner, and include things like outward appearance, body type, interests and personality traits. The second stage, also known as the attraction stage, is when infatuation is most pronounced. Ad Stage 2: Curiosity, Interest, and Infatuation ![]()
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